Day 18

Today is a new day. Since April 29th, the day our son was born, I've been learning how to live this. Nothing makes you live exactly in the exhausted, exhilarated moment like a newborn. No book or class can prepare you for this life. You simply have to bring your baby into the outside world and then live.

It is a new day for him and for me too. He learns how to be okay with the coldness, the hunger, the light, the not-wombness of this new world. I learn how to surrender to motherhood, how to give in to the feedings, the diaper-changing, the holding until your arms go numb, how to live in this fleeting moment and remember it is fleeting. And tomorrow will be a new day. And every day will make him bigger and need me less.

What an awesomely sad and joyful thing it is to be a mother.

Comments

  1. CiggyMay 18, 2012 at 10:57 AM

    You're gonna be an awesome mommy. Looking forward to the updates

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  2. Kate RhudyMay 19, 2012 at 3:20 AM

    I love the expression "not-wombness." I'm sure Jack would have related to that in his early days, though with him now 10 months old (my how time flies!), I'm definitely living the sweetness and tinge of sorrow of his ever-increasing independence. I too look forward both to the photos of the newest addition and your musings on the motherhood journey.

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